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Showing posts with label ink-and-paper dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ink-and-paper dreams. Show all posts

Because I Was a Reader First Before I Became a Writer

In Kindergarten, my first taste of reading came from tediously going through each page of the phonics textbook. Every night, my mom (who is ever patient by the way, and reads my blog so Hi Mom! *waves*) would help me sound off each syllable ba, be, bi, bo, bu. Followed by the list of sample words underneath it: bat, barometer, barrista, and er...batman? Okay, I'm sure they were simpler, more age-appropriate words but it's been years since I was five and I just woke up, alright?

Anyway, it was grueling. I'm not kidding. Each page was covered with words and more words. This was work, people. No goofing around the -ghts and the -ings. It was a memory test, a drill to get those sight words embedded into the soft, mushy part of your head that is your brain. (I told you my mom was patient.)

I'm sure I cried, protested, feigned sleep a dozen times to get out of it. The only consolation I got was from the little snippets of stories included after rows and rows of gag-inducing words. I remember vividly this one about the milk maid who was off to town to sell the bucket of milk sitting atop her head. While she's walking, she's dreaming of what she can do once she gets money for it. First, she'd buy an egg, which would turn into a hen. The hen will lay her more eggs, which she will sell so she can get a cow. The money that she gets from the eggs and the milk will be enough to buy herself a dress. She would then go to town and dance, and a handsome young man will ask her to be his partner. She would tilt her head and curtsey like so and...down went the bucket of milk she had on top of her head. No milk, no egg; no egg, no hen; no hen, no eggs, no cow; no cow, no milk, no dress.

So before I became a writer, I was a reader. Still am. Reading is easy. Reading is fun. But writing can be a grueling, tedious endeavor, and it is sometimes easier to dream like the milk maid. We sit down to write and muse on dreams of grandeur, of seeing ourselves signing books like a rockstar, maybe even throw in some fame and fortune (and a brand new car!) while we're fantasizing. Daydreams take a chunk off your time and imagination, just so you know. Before you know it, the kids are awake and demanding to be fed; the house is a pigsty; the chore list is three miles long; and hey, what is that strange-looking stain on the carpet, and down goes the bucket of milk atop your head.

Still, I write and keep on writing. 'Cause I know if I'm patient enough, if I can endure the ultimate phonics test while only five, I can turn that bucket of milk into a dress.

Random Musings on Free Meal Tuesdays, Library Escapades, and Conquering Writing Fears

Tuesdays are generally considered “blah” days. Nothing ever happens on a Tuesday. People are tired and cranky, their adrenaline already spent on the grueling demands of the day before. The weekend seems so far away. No wonder restaurants have “Kids Eat Free on Tuesday” posters plastered all over their front windows. Because business is agonizingly slow on a “blah” day.


I love Tuesdays. I love knowing I’ve already gotten my grocery shopping done, how I have the option of staying home all day long in my pjs and working on my WIP, and how I can look forward to our Library Escapade, when I take the kids to our local library and come home with thirty different books and DVDs.
I love knowing the week is far from over, because as much as I love spending the weekend with the whole family and getting to eat out (which means I don’t have to cook, yay!), I also long for the quiet days when nothing is expected of me. Of course it’s never truly quiet at home, not when there’s a three-year-old boomerang who keeps coming back to me for drinks, snacks, potty, hugs, and kisses (the latter two I don’t mind getting over and over again).
I love having the time to sit and write. My brain’s in constant motion: always shooting off idea tangents, worrying about what to make for dinner, wondering why it’s suddenly so quiet in the next room where the human boomerang is, and thinking of scenes for my story all at the same time. It’s ADHD inside. On the outside, I’m the picture of calm. So calm in fact I got an award in one of my college classes as the “Most Calm Person in the Room”. To this day, I’m not sure if that was complimentary—not if it meant I was practically comatose in class. *grin*
When I write, it’s like a shaft has been opened in my head letting out the pressure that comes from having an overcrowded mind. It’s relief. It’s my meditation sans painful yoga pose. A chance to connect with that self—the unlabeled self. Not the wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend that I am to others. And I greet it like an old friend. Hey you, I recognize you. It’s been awhile.
When I write I am also faced with fears. For years I kept it to myself. I wrote in journals. I had imaginary conversations in my head with the characters I write about. I didn’t let anyone read what I wrote because I was afraid. I didn’t dare tell anyone my dream of becoming a writer. Until one day, while hanging out in the kitchen with my kids, my seven-year-old asked her little brother what he wants to be when he grows up. His answer: a monster, a fireman, and a zombie. We laughed. Then he turned to me and asked in that sweet innocent voice: What do you want to be when you grow up, Mommy?
A writer, I said. I want to write books. And guess what? The world did not cave in, nobody laughed at me, and my kids nodded their pretty little heads like this was a totally cool answer.
So here I am. Pursuing my ink-and-paper dreams. Saying that out loud is scary, but knowing I'm still standing up is enough to keep me going. 

Precy Larkins's books on Goodreads
Winter's Regret: What Might Have Been Winter's Regret: What Might Have Been
reviews: 2
ratings: 4 (avg rating 5.00)

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Precy's bookshelf: read

Whispering Minds
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
Night of Cake & Puppets
The Fault in Our Stars
The Return of the King
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
The Last Olympian
The Hundred: Fall of the Wents
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
The Hunger Games
Wonder
The Founders' Code
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
The Two Towers
The Book Thief
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
The Lost Hero
Divergent
The Battle of the Labyrinth


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